Friday, May 7, 2010

About a boy


I went out with a boy on Wednesday.

The boy was off work early, and so was I. We met in the afternoon at Lauriol Plaza for swirl margaritas in honor of Cinco de Mayo.

He was boisterous and animated, as usual. He talked to everyone around us, including a couple of girls.

**I wasn't crazy about that.

The boy left the bar area for a minute or two.

"Is that your boyfriend?" one of the girls asked.

I shook my head. "No."

"Is he always like that?" the other asked.

"Yeah, pretty much," I said. "He can talk to anyone."

"All he did was talk about you," the first girl said.

**I was crazy about that.

The boy came back. Somehow, we partied with a reality TV star. The details are fuzzy. Tequila shots were involved.

The boy was hell-bent on finding a sombrero and persuaded the reality star to walk six blocks down U Street with us to get one at Alero.

En route, the boy turned to me.

"Did it bother you when I was talking to those other girls?"

"A little," I said.

"Don't worry," he said, taking my hand. "I know who I came here with."

**I was crazier about that.

Alero was packed. The reality star left. The boy and I went to Dodge City. We had beers. I updated my Facebook status to an embarrassing degree. My judgment was clouded by a thick fog of alcohol and infatuation.

Actually, "infatuation" is the wrong word. Infatuation doesn't even come close.

Captivated, enraptured, smitten. Those are better.

I was starving. So was the boy. We cabbed to the Mount Vernon Triangle Busboys and Poets and got food.

It was open mic night. The boy performed a poem.

Smitten. That's the word. Yes, definitely smitten.

It was late. We'd long since run out of daylight. The boy drove me home...

And I woke up in his arms.

That boy makes me happy...

That boy was John.



  1. Be careful lovely... he IS a pickup artist.

  2. John and I had a LONG conversation right around the time you first posted about him. He was upset about my comments. I told him I was upset that he never seemed 'real.' Back then I said, run, But you know what, I was 'smitten' by John at one point as well. He was a character in every sense of the word. I know exactly what you are feeling right now. And I hope he really likes you. Because if he doesn't, then our conversation meant nothing and he's still a con, and I'll never speaking to him again. I've never met you but I can tell you're not much different than me. Happiness seems just out of reach. I hope you your fingertips at least come close.

  3. Is it wrong that I kind of hoped this would happen (after reading your initial John chronicles)?

  4. o.. m...g! was not expecting that ending! proceed with caution...

  5. bit too smooth for my tastes...

    not to be too paranoid...but the little falling out they had makes "Date Me" feel like she owes him something...kind of right where he wants her.

  6. What does John look like again? I think I saw you at Lauriol on Wed. Was he the tall guy with a white shirt or the guy in a business suit?

  7. The hopeless romantic in me loves this post, but my head agrees with the "proceed with caution" sentiment. Keep us posted. Also, I need to email you. Will do that now.

  8. I say proceed, period. Don't be too cautious until you're given a reason to be. From what little I know of this boy, he seems to be a stand-up guy. Yeah, yeah, he's a pick-up artist, but he told you that straight out. Make the best of it.

  9. I have to agree with Joe, mostly.

    You can still be cautious... but there is no reason to not trust. Maybe he is just as smitten with you as you are with him.

    And by cautious, I generally mean as logical as possible. Don't do something you would regret if it all goes to shit.

  10. This is so 90's plush romance, serendipity, shakespeare in love type of stuff.

    Look at it from every angle. You're screwed. And I'm the other PUA, and I'm coming right out with it.

    He has his hooks in you, he's hooked you. There's nothing that you or any of these people on these blogs can say, because you are hooked. And no matter how slow you walk, or how cautious you're strung, whenever he calls you, you'll free up, or postpone, or wait in hopes that you could play the game better, but you can't you're running uphill.

    Advice: Don't let go. Because the minute you let go, he'll walk off and move on. That's a silly mistake. Don't try to freeze him out.

    John with an H, seems way more organized than where I am with game. Yeah, those are lines, well conspired and delivered. But, that doesn't mean they're not real, he just offering what every weak pathetic man wish he could say but is at a loss of words he can handle.

    Look your doing fine, and yes your probably setting yourself up for heartache. But the truth is, he's the best thing you got right now, so you should really enjoy the game.

  11. *To the readers of 'Date Me, D.C.': The person known as CMark and accused in earlier blog posts of arranging this boy/girl pairing accepts no responsibility for this latest turn of events. Unless it is wildly successful and leads to church bells and rugrats, in which case he expects the firstborn to be named in his honor. Further, CMark makes no predictions on the outcome of the aforementioned arrangement, other than to offer that life is pretty fucking funny sometimes and love comes walking in whenever it pleases. Above all, please disregard any bullshit you read about playing the game and pick up artisting and blah blah blah. If you meet someone you like, spend time with them, see where it goes. Stop trying to force it, label it, analyze it, dissect it, understand it, scrutinize it, illustrate it or overanalyze it. Just. Fucking. Be.*

  12. OMG! This could be fun. I agree with CMark. Just see where it goes.

  13. That post was exciting! I felt like I was watching a tv show.

  14. I'm on the same page as CMark: "Love comes walking in whenever it pleases." And also: "Stop trying to force it, label it, analyze it..." Life's for living.

  15. So here's my take.

    Last night, I was talking about all of this with Meg and Al, and they asked: "Do you want us to try to stop you?"

    "Well, you can," I said, "but I'm probably going to tell you to go fuck yourselves."

    I don't know if John's full of bullshit. I like to believe he's not, though he very well may be. And no one else reading through these comments knows for sure either (except John himself, and I'm fairly certain he's not going to weigh in).

    But the thing is, half the people in this city are full of bullshit, and they don't make me laugh nearly as much as John does. There's something about this man that took me from being irritated with a co-worker who suggested to our faces that we date ("Thanks for making it fuckin' awkward, Betsy -- he smells like cigarettes, and I'm just not interested") to getting the proverbial butterflies every time I see a BlackBerry Message from him pop up on my cell phone's front screen. And when we're hanging out together, the only thing I can think is: "I can't believe he picked me. He. Picked. ME."

    So yeah, the PUA Jon who commented here is right: John DOES have me hooked. I find him endlessly fascinating and totally inspiring. He makes me want to look prettier, be smarter and, above all, be a better writer -- I have created some of the best things I've ever written over the last month and a half, and it's all because he's been my muse.

    In short, John makes me want to be a better version of me. And if it ends badly, well, then he's just served as a coach to refine me a little bit for the guy I'm actually supposed to end up with.

    I see no other choice but to go with that.

  16. Chances are his feelings for you are sincere. But chances are greater that he's not in this for the long haul...not even close.

    But, you strike me as someone who could bounce back very quickly if this doesn't last long.


  17. And to C.Mark:

    Please, if you're going to refuse to hang out with me outside of work, then for fuck's sake, write a blog. Or at least let me contract you out for a guest post.

  18. Given past events, it seems that starting something up again would carry some significance, you know? I mean, if he's not really into it, after what happened before, then why bother? I say go for it. Be as cautious as you can.. but you and I suck at that, so just LIVE. I am optimistic for you. No, it's not a movie, but maybe he really DOES like you and this pick-up thing was just something he did when he felt he hadn't found the right girl. Who knows! Have fun, be smart.

  19. hate to be the male naysayer on this blog of femininity, but seriously...if someone says "I've been an axe murderer before, and shows you his axes and shows you the dungeon and you go along with him, because he probably wont axe murder ME, than have at it...but from a male perspective, we either want you or we don't, no conversion will take place, and from a purely cynical side of it...he may still feel he has a use for you, so he is seeing what happens...because he has shown you he is not above using people. so if you want to go for it and "live a little" than go for it, but don't be surprised if you wind up inches away from the murderers axe saying "i should have seen that coming"

  20. The guys sounds like a dude who knows how to get along well with people. He also seems to bring something out in you that you enjoy. The post you did about your trip to OH seemed to be an essential precursor to this post.

    Bottom line if you like the guy, go for it. Plus his name is worth at least 14 points in scrabble

  21. sounds like a fun time. just roll with it and see where it takes you. :)

  22. Wanted to add a few other little insights:

    @C.Mark -- Let's not delve into "church bells" or "rugrats," shall we? I know I just wrote a bunch of sappy puppy love shit, but in reality, we've only been talking for like a month and a half and I don't even want to touch making it Facebook official with a 100-foot pole. As someone wise (I'm guessing) once said, "Don't go there."

    @Scrabble guy -- yes, the first name is 14 points, but the last name is even more impressive: 19 points.

  23. Katie,

    Don't think. Be. It will work out or it won't. The best way to fuck it up is to over-analyze it. You have hung out with him before, this wasn't a one night stand, you have the butterflies, he makes you want to be a better person, and you love his company. What more could you possibly ask for?

    Dating is 100% risk, and I really respect your take on this. Dive in head first and see what happens.

  24. Gosh, that sounded absolutely adorable.

    Maybe you'll be the one to slay the playa playa part of John. Maybe you won't. But you'll never know either if you don't give it a shot right?

    Keep your head up, and just keep your wits about you, and I'm sure things will work out either way :)

    (also. The fact that he wouldn't shut up about you while talking to other girls, I'd say counts as a good sign!)

  25. Sigh.
    He is not different. You are not special.

    Sorry, but it had to be said.


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