Thursday, January 13, 2011

To give a "leg man" a chance? Also, a happy hour

So, obviously, tall man speed dating last week was less than ideal. I came away from it feeling like I hadn't met anyone I'd care to get to know further.

And frustratingly enough, I have totally cleaned up from it! Out of the 15 or so guys that participated, I have received seven e-mails asking me for a date. It's the water-water-everywhere-but-not-a-drop-to-drink conundrum.

Until I got this e-mail, which I will dissect for you so it makes sense:
Hi Katie, this is [name redacted]. Talking to you was the most fun I had all night. I would love to hear from you. We could get together to sneak into an authorized personnel only facility1 and do some heroin2 like we talked about. So give a leg man3 a chance and send me a message back. [Name still redacted.]
1. I said something about how you should always act like you know what you're doing, with my example being that you could sneak into an authorized-personnel-only facility and security guards would not bat an eyelash if you did it with finesse.

2. When he asked me what I did for fun, I sarcastically replied, "Heroin, mostly." Can't take credit for that joke, though. (Thanks, RTP.)

3. I'm somewhat gifted in the boob area, so at one point I'd said something to the effect of, "Yeah, any guy who is interested in me is clearly not a 'leg man'."

The point is, even though on the surface I don't think I could be interested in this particular suitor -- he was one of the younger participants, but uber geeky -- I have to admit I'm flattered by this e-mail/ impressed that he listened and didn't send me the same lame form letter that all the other guys clearly sent to every single girl they met there.

So, do I give this "leg man" a chance, even though I think I'll never be interested? Is it wrong to go into a date thinking that way, but acknowledging there is a remote possibility he'll change my mind? What if I went into it 100 percent committed to paying my own way?

Now, you can help me answer this question and more: There is another Date Me, D.C. Happy Hour afoot! I'm a little late in getting the word out this time around, but it's going to be Tuesday, Jan. 18, at 6 p.m. You can either RSVP to the Facebook event, or send me an e-mail at to let me know you'll be there.

And judging by the last happy hour, we are all guaranteed to have a good time.

Hope to see you there!


  1. If you really don't want to go, you don't have to. You don't want be dreading the date. But on the other hand, like you said, it is kind of nice that his e-mail proved he was listening to you. You could always just make it a drinks date or something, so that it doesn't have to last very long if you don't want it to.
    And how I wish I lived in the D.C. area so that I could go to one of your Happy Hour events! They sound like so much fun.

  2. I think you should just put yourself in his shoes and think whether you would want a guy to agree to a date when he has no interest in you. Maybe you would or maybe you wouldn't, but just assume this guy would feel the same way and act accordingly.

  3. If your skeptical.. its likely to be a bad idea.

    You seem to have good sense/judgement when it comes to this stuff.

  4. I dont know who K-Dawg is (above) but that is GREAT advice. I for one, do NOT go out with someone a second time if I'm positive that I'm not interested in them because I don't want to waste my time or their's or lead them on. However, there are exceptions to every rule. That's a really well thought out and sincere note, so maybe you make an exception here? I wasn't there so I don't know how much you were NOT feeling it. If you do decline, you can always write back and say how much you appreciated the very clever invitation but he's just not a good fit for you. Cheers, T.

  5. Flattery is awesome, but it's probably not enough to substantiate a whole date, especially with your busy social calendar. Then again, it's hard to know that much about someone in five minutes, and his response was thoughtful.

    Can't wait for happy hour!

  6. I'm totally biased because one of dear friends is a totally geeky guy who practically wets himself every time he tries to talk to a girl, but is a GREAT guy who one day will make someone very happy-- I think you should give the guy a chance. Not only did he listen to you, but his note is funny and cute, and also kind of ballsy. Maybe personality can trump the geek factor.

    I acknowledge this is a long shot.

  7. Awwwww was the cutie patootie from the bar? That could be a really endearing date. Why not? He's harmless. Except for that van...

  8. I think you should give him a chance. There are lots of funny guys who could keep you in stitches but who also take a little while to warm up and show that side of their personality. He's definitely interested in you and is at least doing something right by paying attention and remembering details. And let's be honest, that's half the battle right there.

  9. Go. It's just an outing. He probably already knows you're not that interested. I also agree w/ K-Dawg. This time.

  10. @Mary El: No, had it been that first guy, there wouldn't have even been a question. I'd definitely go out with him. This was one of the more awkward guys there.

  11. Tough call.

    There's times where I've seen chemistry suddenly come into play when before was nothing with skepticism. But generally when there's nothing there, there will continue to be nothing there.

    I'd say, maybe agree to go out with the guy in a friends type setting. Getting to know each other more as friends, with no rules or dating stuff. If it sparks an interest through this meeting that does not have a set bar to climb above, then go on an actual date. If not, you can acknowledge you gave the guy the chance but that there is seriously no chemistry.


Tell me what you think!